Scream if you want to go faster

It's not such a bad thing at all, to be homeless. A few phone calls is all it takes to see that the world is full of wonderful, beautiful people so willing to help, and I believe in Goodness once again (not that I ever stopped). A friend of a friend has opened up her home for me and nothing could be better - living in a Chinese family, 太棒了! I'll do my absolute best to behave!

In every aspect, this has been a wonderful week. Drinks in plural (with taste!) and good food - I have come to understand that this might not be the end of the world, after all. I could live here. The Olympic flag can be seen in ever corner and the cars are on schedule not to pollute the precious air. I've visited the Olympic village but one is forced to look from a distance, the security is more than intense and I dare not think of the Prices. No, the television will be my friend and I can scream for Sweden and China with a beer in hand in accordance with traditions.


After watching the Korean psyche ward romance I'm a Cyborg, but that's okay I am considering taking up yodling. What better way to be excotic? I doubt that Blonde is enough in Beijing, I had better step up. I have started wearing heels again and Theodore says I look smart. Real progress comes with time.

Chinese of the day:
"敢不敢？“
Do you dare to?

北京，我到了

I'm here, I am homeless, I am tipsy and I know that I can make it.


Chinese of the day:
“Go Go 加油!”
(Quote from Full House)

Anxiety

For the first time in my life, I am reluctant to go. I have too many things - so many things to leave behind. My whole life in 20 kilos - it's not easy to plan one's packing when leaving for good.

I don't know why I'm going away. I know that I have to, it's an unwritten rule because it has already been two years and temporary roots shan't grow too deep but my stomach keeps screaming (normally I'd think it was the hot pot but I haven't been sleeping either). Home is where the heart is and mine isn't ready to settle, it probably never will be.

But at this point, I am even willing to forgive the Sichuan dialect for it's whiny faults.

Today is my last day and I had to make sure I wouldn't regret anything so I got up early, thus remaining partly blind until noon because of fatigue. I don't know why I do these things.


Breakfast at Starbucks, Macchiato to make the stomach happy and Melanie reminded me that I am Very Stupid. I am going to miss her so much. My French is going to lack immensely after some time without her, what a loss! I will become quite the savage.

And Howie, dear, dear Howie. "Cecilia, you have to look more normal in your pictures, stop smiling like a freak. Try to be pretty." I tried my best. He tried, too, but without success. And when a scanderly clad girl walked by and he said "come to daddy", I was as proud as a mother can be - his humour has reached the European standard and my job is done.


But I still don't want to go.

This is it. Jay is packed and all is ready, I think. I have a bottle of orange juice, too. My phobia of airports isn't as bad as it used to be, but I'm still not keen on getting up at five for my flight.

I'm going to miss my life as it used to be. But on the other hand, there is only one direction from down here.

Chinese of the day:
一路平安
Travel safely

Nerves

But what if I don't want to go?

怎么办？

What little time we have left

It always amazes me how quickly time passes when you have none to spare. I am, of course, trying to milk everything out of Chengdu while I still can and that includes running around to all those places I should have visited during my two year stay but somehow never did. Around here, parks (and bamboo) are essential so it was only natural that Melanie and I should sweat away an afternoon out in the green.



杜甫草堂 (tu fu cao tang) is as green as it gets, really, with far too many cross-roads and we walked for hours down paths that just never seemed to end. It's a poetry themed park and though I can't quite understand all that's written on the rocks down the Poetry Walk, I like to pretend that I do. We got lost, of course, it's only logical and the signs that recommended us to "make a dating in a musical platform" didn't really help. Still, I almost wish we hadn't found our way out.



I am not sure why I waited until my last week here to visit but when I was little I always saved the best chocolates for last, perhaps the habit stuck with me. As for now, I wish I had more time.

Chinese of the day:
“你为什么不喜欢我！哇哇哇！”
"Why don't you like me! (crying noises)"
Courtesy of That Boy Whose Name I Can Never Remember Because It's Too Damn Long

Beginnings

I shall admit my fault immediately – I am awful with the letter writing. Really, I cannot seem to reply to anyone in time! This blog is an attempt to keep those interested with regular updates (since LJ died again and, let’s face it, Resedagboken wasn’t really an option) and photos, too, if I can remember. I hereby resolve to become a better person and I am certain to keep my pledge for at least a few weeks, hopefully so much longer.

As for those of you who may have stumbled across me by mistake, you are welcome, of course, but the word is to approach with caution. It’s not that I bite – I am kinder than most – but there are certain rules around here. First off, everything needs to be divided by three. I can’t quite explain it to you, but the whole word is made out of threes and there’s little to be done about that. Unless, of course, we pass twelve while we are counting, for at that point I will not care anymore. Secondly, while many of you might know Theodore by now, he has a new roommate, a boy named Ming (明), and it’s a little tense in there right now so please be gentle. Three: Jay Chou (周杰伦) – enough said.

At present I am caught in the whirlwind that is Finals and there is little room for anything but Chinese. I am still in Chengdu, Sichuan, grieving the coming move from what feels more like home to me than Sweden ever did. Why, Beijing will have to step up for a chance to win my heart!

Chinese of the day:
“哇，你好帅！有没有女朋友啊？真的吗？讨厌哦。”
“Wow, you’re so good-looking! Do you have a girlfriend? Really? Oh, shoo.”